San Luis Obispo, CA (AIP) – Malaysia Airlines spokesman
Najib Vong confirmed Thursday that Malaysia Flight 360 has been has finally
been located and recovered, drawing to a close the multi-national search and
rescue mission that has been hunting the missing aircraft since February of
this year.
“I was stunned,” said Michael Krenwich, a 19-year old part
time Sip’N’Go employee and graduate of San Luis Obispo High School. “I saw on
the news that the plane had gone missing so I took some time looking around my
apartment – in the closet, in the kitchen cabinet – and finally found the damn
thing under my living room couch next to my lost wheelbarrow game piece from
the Monopoly set.”
Malaysia Airline spokesman Vong had no explanation as to how
the plane ended up under the brown faux suede couch in Krenwich’s apartment.
“Our original search for Flight 360 began in the Indian
Ocean,” said Vong, speaking via satellite phone from Kuala Lumpur. “We later expanded the search to include Los
Angeles and Compton. We don’t really
know how it got so much further north.
“But hell, we’ve lost like nine planes in the past six
months. One was found in a thrift store
in Vancouver (British Columbia). We just don’t seem to be able to keep track of
the damn things.”
“Hey, I understand,” said Krenwich. “Do you have any idea how many cell phones I’ve
lost? It can happen to anyone.”
The plane Krenwich located should not be confused with
Malaysia Airlines flight 370 which disappeared on March 8, 2014 shortly after takeoff
from Kuala Lumpur International Airport with 227 passengers and 12 crew members. That plane remains missing.
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