Tuesday, September 30, 2014

Woman Killed At Orlando Theme Park

Orlando (AIP) – A 42-year old wife and mother of four was killed at Disney World’s Magic Kingdom Wednesday when what horrified onlookers say was a 7 foot grizzly bear mauled and partially ate the woman as she stood in line with her family outside Disney’s Space Mountain thrill ride.

“It was horrific,” said Megan Potter, from Toledo, OH, who watched the grizzly kill Amanda Sorreto just after 2:00 p.m.. “At first we all thought the bear was some sort of new animatronics or an actor in a costume. Then the thing clawed her with his paw and bite off most of her left shoulder. It chewed on her for a while and then just lumbered off.”

Disney officials were baffled by the event.

“We aren’t sure how a grizzly bear, which isn’t native to Florida, actually gained entry to the park,” said Disney Spokesman Conner Oday. “It’s the damndest thing.”

A similar death occurred at the park in 2012 when a pack of wolves killed several Chinese tourists near Splash Mountain. There was also an incident in 1989 when a Chupacabra took the life of a 14-year old girl scout outside Peter Pan’s Flight.

Legal experts point to the 1989 killing as the impetuous for the Florida Legislature to pass the 1990 “You’ve Got to Be Fucking Kidding Me” law that specifically exempts theme parks and other tourist destinations from legal liability when guests are killing in ways that are considered bizarre or strange.

“It’s like the law was tailor made for this incident,” said Osceola County Sheriff Dewayne Stutts. “We’ve decided not to investigate at all, other than to see if the law against feeding nuisance animals was violated.”

Sorreto’s husband Thomas said that he was saddened by the incident but he and his four children “still had a pretty fun day regardless.”

“The kids were sad at first but we had a blast later down on Main Street and they were just fine,” said Sorreto.

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