MIAMI (AIP) – Upstart golf equipment manufacturer Hadley Golf Limited has announced that it will unveil its new line of Cocksucker Golf equipment, including balls, clubs, bags and clothing, at the Doral Open on March 4th.
“I’m sure the weekend duffer is excited by the Cocksucker line,” said Marvin Graley, senior development vice president at Hadley Golf. “I mean guys have been screaming 'cocksucker!' for generations after watching a horrible shot leave the club face. Now they can own a brand that says it for them.”
Two-time tour winner and PGA golf sensation Carlos Castenda is the first pro signed to represent the new line. He says the equipment gives the weekend golfer an edge.
"Shanks, skulls, worm burners, chili dips. These Cocksucker balls and clubs have every shot," said Castenda. "The irons and woods are so unpredictable that you never know how your ball is going to come off the fairway. If you carry Cocksucker you'll always have a reason for playing a crap round of golf. It really is the fault of the equipment and not the man."
"Our new clubs and balls provide a valid, if somewhat pricey, reason why your golf game sucks," said Graley. "Once you get these no further excuses are necessary."