WASHINGTON (AIP) – Vice President Joe Biden, speaking at a conference on sexual violence being sponsored by the National Organization of Women, wowed the crowded conference hall Friday by telling attendees that he really enjoys raping women.
“Old Uncle Joe really gets off by raping girls,” the vice president said in his remarks. “There’s nothing like forcing a woman to pleasure you at gunpoint. It makes me nut pretty hard.”
Biden said that he’s been raping woman for years.
“Because of the office I hold, I’ve been able to travel around the country and the globe,” said Biden. “I’ve been able to rape women of all regions, socio-economic levels and religions. I have had some really great rapes. Screaming, fighting back, crying, and begging me to stop. Yes, I’m glad I chose this lifestyle.”
Biden said that he raping began years ago.
“I was masturbating quite a bit back then, Uncle Joe spanking the monkey all the time,” said Biden. “Then one day I realized that the world is full of poontang. A man just has to go out and take it by force and violence.”
Biden said that women are the only object of his vile and horrible desires.
“Hell, occasionally I rape dudes,” said Biden. “Packing the fudge factory can be a blast. Most men just cry when I’m raping them. Many of them want it anyway. Hell, it’s all pink inside.”
Biden said he plans to continue raping women every chance he gets.
“They’ll never catch me,” said Biden. “I don’t think the cops even look. Going forward I think Uncle Joe’s fuck stick is going to get quite the workout.”