Friday, March 13, 2015

Blogger Avoids Commitment

LARGO, FL (AIP)- Andy Rawl, senior editor and chief writer of this blog, is taking a week off after a local judge gave him the option of 'backing away' from the keyboard or going to jail 'till you learn to enjoy sodomy'.

"I'll take option one," said Rawl, sweating like a marathoner at the podium. "I guess I need some time off."

The judge then asked Rawl if he understood her order was 'for his own good'.

Rawl, clearly visible to this reporter, choked back his first response and finally answered.

"Yes Judge".

Rawl's supervisor,  Wendy Oughtman, was disappointed in Rawl's standing at the hearing.

"At least he could have tightened his tie and stood upright like a the homo sapien during his sentencing" said Oughtman. "His tie isn't knotted and he's fucking burping repeatedly."

Rawl spoke with reporters after leaving court.

"Fuck me, anybody got a beer?", asked Rawl, who kindly accepted a coldie from this correspondent.  "Nobody's gonna hear dick from me for a week."

Rawl sped off with a short-haired blonde in 8 inch heels moments later, flipping off reporters and bystanders off while Def Leopard's Pour Some Sugar On Me  played out of the car's open windows.

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